The Matuto and the Micories
The Matuto is not excited about these elections. Perhaps because of the lands of Vera Cruz that they have so generously received the Matuto in his bosom, or for the fake of putting together another round of electoralist tricks, the truth is that the May 18 event leaves the matutus indifferent.
In the simple opinion of the Matuto this campaign has been based on wild promises, drovers and various abuse. As if it was worth everything to get some simple votes. By the way the Matuto remembers the famous phrase “Pecunia Non Olet”-money has no smell. The Matuto knows from a safe source that was the Emperor Vespasian the author of the famous phrase. To prevent them from urinating on the streets of Rome, Vespasian had public urinals built that were named after the emperor. To compensate for the investment, he taxed the ‘Vespasian’ – still survive several in Rome today. His son Tito found a disregard for taxes for a private, public need. Vespasian then said: « Pecunia Non Olet. » Therefore, the money has no smell, and apparently the votes do not – concludes the matuto.
Of course the use of bathrooms around the world varies greatly. Sometimes it’s an art. Matuto’s kind wife, Dona Sirlei, was very offended when in London asked him for some pounds to use the ‘bathroom’. The entrance that gave access to ‘relief of bladder pressure’ had a turnstile, where the required amount should be introduced. Dona Sirlei found it absurd. Now, for physical reasons, this appeal of nature is more easily resolved by man. For a lady the thinner thing. The Matuto already hears the complaints of the Left Bacoca: One more reason to consider man as toxic! BOOKS! There is a pachorra. Ahead.
Here, it must be clarified that the Matuto sympathizes with the female dilemma. While the man stands and straightens, behind a tree, hidden through the car door or against a wall, the woman does not have that ‘at ease’. The man arrives in a dirty, very dirty bathroom (money may have no smell, but there are certain odors that offend the pituitary membrane), with suspicious pockets, and there will be that tomorrow there is no. If necessary, all that filthy scenario, with conviction and bravery. The hero of the latrine. The woman is not quite like that. The woman needs to sit down… Yeah! In the greatest despair, the woman faces the odyssey of ladded teeth. One foot on the clean floor, another in the inevitable puddle, and the body levitating over the toilet (toilet in Brazil, please) so as not to touch none of the dark areas. Periclitant balance. One hand covering the nose and the other to safeguard the garments of the hostile environment. A stunt just about an Olympic athlete!
António Lobo Antunes, in a chronicle about friendship, speaks of the camaraderie of making Chichi with his brother Pedro. He says: “It must be difficult for women to understand this, but for men, doing Chichi side by side, outdoors is a sign of friendship, looking down, full of double complaints. Making Chichi on the street is one of my greatest pleasures, I must have been a dog in another incarnation. (In, fifth book of chronicles, pg 22-23).
Only the Wolf Antunes to lend elegance to something so prosaic. Matuto prefers home modesty for such wanderings. After all, it is not worth everything to relieve body functions. And, not everything is lawful in the conquest of votes. But this does not concern the matutus, as it considers that a gentleman, in the days they run, is seen as a misunderstood lunatic. Hence the Matuto is poorly taking refuge only to regret the corruption of things. After all, a gentleman should not be entangled.
