The history of Transcarpathian who became a foster dad for three children

In Ukraine have About 61.5 thousand orphans and children deprived of parental care.

Despite the fact that most of them live in family forms of education, about 4,000 children still remain in orphanages or boarding schools, waiting for a loving family.

Not everyone has such a chance. But three of these thousands of children were lucky. It is about the pupils of the Chinadiyev children-brother and two sisters-who were accepted for upbringing by 37-year-old Transcarpathian Alexander Kovernyag.

This story proves: in order to be a good father, it is not necessary to be a father biologically. It can be made of your own choice.

Wanted to guide children on the right way

Sometimes we do not know ourselves without making fateful decisions that will change the course of a further life.

In Alexander’s life, such a turning point happened when he got a job at the Chinadiyevsky orphanage in Transcarpathia. Although, of course, he did not know it.

”Actually it was supposed to be a temporary job« , – the man confesses.

He first worked as a driver, then – labor inspector. But over time I realized that he wanted to work with children. He was especially interested in working with « complex » teenagers.

”You see, children in boarding schools do not have a complete understanding of what means to be a full member of society. The boarding system makes them « greenhouse children ». They do not understand most threats in life and do not perceive them properly.

I wanted to instill in children responsibility for their safety and in general for the future« , – he explains.

So in 2018, Alexander went to study for Mentoring program. This is an initiative that allows you to take a « under the wing » of a pet.

Subsequently, he graduated from a master’s degree in psychology. In 2020 he finally achieved the desired goal – began to work as a tutor. In this position, he still does not lose his motivation for his mission.

”My responsibilities as a tutor are to do what parents do for children. To cultivate the behavior of children, to teach themselves how to communicate, to give them an understanding of their responsibilities.

I feel the moral pleasure of what I can send children to the right way« , – the man explains.

In total, more than a hundred pupils of all ages are in the kindergarten: from preschoolers to children 15 years. After 9th grade, they are released from the institution and enter the college. Alexander gives preference to work with the elders.

It was in one of these senior groups that he became closer to Sergiy, who will become his son in a few years.

Familiarity with Sergius

13-year-old Sergei got to a kindergarten in Chinadivo after his dad and mother was deprived of parental rights. According to Alexander, the guy survived a lot. The ideal behavior of the teenager was not different. This, he says, attracted attention.

”When I became a tutor, I worked directly in the group where Sergei was. We started communicating. I realized that his behavior depends on what the child has survived in his past life« , – the man explains.

During this period, Alexander was a mentor for one of the graduates of the institution. When he left the orphanage, Alexander decided to « take under the wing » and Sergius, especially since the guy actively asked about it and showed interest.

However, to establish trust with a child who has been repeatedly betrayed by adults is a difficult task.

”We brought closer gradually. He first looked at me. I will say honestly, only after 11 months of mentoring I felt that the baby started to open up one hundred percent and talk about spiritual losses« , – says Alexander.

He taught the boy different things: how to organize his life, look after himself how to choose a future profession. After learning that Sergei loves football, he helped him organize training.

”Many children dream of becoming successors of Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo. He also wanted it, and I supported him.

For him, I found in the village of Chinadiyovo a trainer of a football team. He agreed to engage with him, and the administration of the institution gave permission to it« , – Alexander shares.

Over time, the guy’s behavior began to change. He felt more confidence.

”Sergei began to look at me as a brother, and possibly as his father. His loved ones also told him, « you have such relationships, you have a father with a son« , – recalls Alexander.

Sergiy’s older brothers constantly advised the boy to « keep up for Alexander. » The guy did so. When the moment came to leave the kindergarten, Sergei and Alexander decided that they do not want to break the connection.

Creating a foster family and moving to Mukachevo

In the summer of 2023, Alexander created a foster family and accepted Sergei for education. He says the bureaucracy was not very much. The main condition is to take courses of foster care. After completing them, candidates for foster parents issue special documents that a person can accept orphans or children deprived of parental care.

The only thing a man felt surprise, if not prejudice from officials, because solo-receiving father is not a very common story. However, the wheels of the wheels, he assures, was not put.

After release from the orphanage, Sergei began to live with Alexander in Mukachevo and establish a joint life. With this, Alexander says, they have no problems.

”We have a rule – Sergei always removes his room. He is very neat and in general « fashion ». It is good to dress, go to Barber is all about him.

Of course, there are times when he does not want something. Then he just nods his head, says « I know everything I am already an adult« , – laughs the man.

The guy studies at the school, works in parallel. Alexander says everything does on his own initiative.

Sergiy’s children’s admiration has grown into a serious hobby. He still goes to workout, and Alexander sometimes joins to look at his game and support.

”He has everything he wants. I see that he is satisfied« , – the man rejoices.

« We have a whole house of children and a dog »

Sergei – from a large family. In total, he had nine brothers and sisters, some of whom also lived in the Chinadiyev Kindergarten.

Two younger sisters-15-year-old Angelina and 12-year-old Ivanna-also began to reach Alexander, knowing that he actually replaced his father for their brother.

”They knew me as a mentor and tutor. Our relationship was well, they saw me about Sergius and how he treats me. They were drawn as well. There was a commitment to me right away, and they had to me.

In the end it became clear that I, Sergei and his sisters want to be in the same family« , – says Alexander.

Thus, in 2024, the man became a foster father for Angelina and Ivanna.

”Now we have a whole house of children and a dog« , – the man jokes.

While Sergei is studying at the school, the girls attend school in Mukachevo. In their spare time, they, together with Alexander, love to go to the cinema and McDonald. The sisters often go to workout in Sergius and watch him play football.

Senior Angelina also wants to try herself in sports and engage in volleyball. Alexander plans to record it on a profile circle with the beginning of autumn.

”The girls as soon as they came to live, they began to call me my dad. Apparently it was the most moving moment« , – the man confesses.

What should be prepared for a foster care?

First, Alexander says, you need to collect a lot of documents and plunge into the bureaucracy.

”We need to gain desire and patience. My path was simple. In other families, I know, it was more difficult« , – says the man.

The passage of a formal procedure is a trifle. The real trials begin when the child is taken from the institution. The foster parents need to be prepared for 100 or even 200 percent in the upbringing of the child and teach it elementary things.

”I noticed that often people take a baby from the orphanage and do not understand that you need to teach it to wash, dress, put things up.

Children from « greenhouse » kindergartens. They do not understand much. Consider they have no financial literacy. The gap is very large. Whatever the age of the baby should be ready to teach it from scratch as from birth« , – gives advice Alexander.

It is constant, daily work. It is not always easy, Alexander admits. But the main thing is not to forget why everything is.

”She pleases when I see children trying to do the right thing for themselves – and for me.

In such moments I look at them and realize that everything was done right« , – says the man.

If you also feel a willingness to accept children in your family – all the necessary information, step -by -step algorithms of action, a list of documents, etc. See the state Online platform About adoption and family forms of education.